" HE CHEATED...NOW WHAT"???

Over the past few days, I have spoken with a myriad of women trying to figure out what to do when a relationship with a man has gone sour. From constant arguments to infidelity, relationships are suffering and because of "LOVE", people are deciding to stay in hurtful situations or leaving situations that could possibly be fixed. Hurt comes when we have certain expectations for a situation that are not met or standards that are compromised. For the next week, I will write about relationship woes. Today let's start with infidelity. What do you do when you have found out that your mate has engaged in a relationship outside of the one that you two are involved in? Your first instinct would say to leave but, let's be realistic ladies, it makes no sense to leave, yet, still worry about what he's doing, constantly call him crying, or say that it's over unless you truly are ready to let go. Initially, it is only natural to feel betrayed but, don't just wallow in pity over it. Pray for peace, be determined to forgive, and make a decision about where this person stands as far as being in a relationship is concerned. Unless, the other woman is a relative or close friend, there is no need to lash out at her because,simply she had no commitment to you. As for your mate, there are certain things we need to find out does he even intend to stop the relationship with the other woman? Does he want to continue a relationship with you? Can this relationship be healed? Can you forgive? Let's be honest ladies, just because you "want" to be in a relationship, doesn't always mean that you should. At this point, it's time for a break, which means you take time to be by yourself and really reevaluate the relationship. If you need to cry, cry. Write down a list of pros and cons of the relationship. Write down a list of great things about yourself. Don't allow yourself to believe that he was unfaithful because of something that you did or didn't do, it had nothing to do with you. Take a serious look at the overall relationship, if infidelity is a pattern, this probably is an indication that your mate is not ready for a committed relationship and you can't force him. The best thing you can do is acknowledge this and decide whether or not you are willing to deal with this type of behavior. Keep in mind, that not only is your heart in jeopardy but, so is your physical well being. Sex kills. After spending time alone to gather yourself, to pray and ask God for direction, and to really figure out if you want to be with this person and can forgive, then you should ask what his intentions are for you and him. If his goal is to work on what you had there has to be some clear communication on what is expected. Don't just start where you left off, there has to be changes. Tell him what you want, don't just assume that he knows. You may find he is not as willing to work on rebuilding the trust you once had and that can save you both time and added heartache. If you truly aren't ready to forgive, take the time you need to do so. Explain to him that you need time, this is a great way to see if he serious about the relationship, a man that wants to be with you genuinely will do whatever it takes to fix what he has done. Take notice, if when you tell him you need time to work some things out and to make sure you are capable of handling and truly forgiving him does he use this time to "do  him". This is a tell tale sign that he is simply not ready for a monogamous relationship. One of the biggest mistakes women make is saying we forgive and continuing in a relationship yet, constantly bring it up. If you can't forgive or trust him, let the relationship go. Infidelity isn't aways a deal breaker but, it is a RED FLAG that your relationship is in big trouble. The question is can the relationship survive and is it worth saving? Join me tomorrow as we discuss, the "OTHER WOMAN" . Please feel free to comment or ask questions as this is a open forum.

"IF IT DON'T FIT-DON'T BE AFRAID TO QUIT"

Why are so many women single yet, are in a committed relationship? What causes so many long term relationships not to advance to marriage. Women would say that they are supportive, loving, and all that a man could want or need, yet, he won't marry her. When we begin dating a man, the expectation has to be clearly set, if you are ultimately looking for a husband, don't be afraid to say that. Don't sacrifice what you want for the sake of "being down", it will haunt you in the long run and you can bet your bottom dollar , he won't forget what you say initially and it will come up. What are some deal breakers? If the man steps out on you with another woman, and this is unacceptable don't stay with him and keep fighting about it and bringing it up. If you decide to stay with him, forgive him and move on. If you can't forgive him, end the relationship and move on, this is a huge reason so many relationships are in a miserable place.  Stop giving a man who is merely a boyfriend all the benefits that you would give your husband. You give no incentive for a man to take the big step to marry you. If you are having sex with him, co-habitating with him, washing his clothes, etc...right now, what is the urgency for this man to marry you. Women take responsibility for what is happening in the relationships that we are in, you can have the relationship you want but, it's up to you to set the standards. If you don't want a guy that smokes, then don't start dating one thinking that you will change him. That's another big mistake, we date a man thinking we will eventually change all the things we don't like about him and end up miserable because, he is who he is. Here's a tip, when dating already know what things you can compromise on also, know what you won't  accept and don't waver on it. Religion, promiscuity, lying, work ethics, abuse, and disrespect for example are things that shouldn't be compromised. Women we have to wake up, if it doesn't make you happy now, chances are it won't make you happy in the future. There is someone for everyone and yes, relationships are work, but, if you don't have the right ingredients in the beginning it becomes less likely that things will get better. My sisters don't be afraid to wait, don't be afraid to be single, in the long run it will be well worth the wait.

"THE GREEN EYED MONSTER"

Women are often plagued when it comes to possessions and relationships by jealousy. I was in the mall the other day and as I walked pass a couple, the woman gave me a look of such hatred. I smiled and said, "Hello" then kept it moving. What was this woman's problem? I had never seen her before a day in my life but, the way she looked at me, you would have thought that, I had done the ultimate wrong to her. What is it with women when they see a good looking woman in the vicinity of their mate? Is it insecurity? Her husband looked at me but, he didn't stare. After talking to a variety of different women and doing some research, I've come to the conclusion that this is a sign of jealousy. This woman had no reason to feel as if I was in competition with her. What jealousy causes us to do is to create a scenario in our mind that doesn't even exist or because of past let downs, see every person as a potential problem. We have to stop it. There are many beautiful women on the planet so if every time we are with our mate, we see an attractive woman are we suppose to feel inferior? What is that saying about us? Confidence is a very wonderful thing to have. We have to start building ourselves up. Dressing up, wearing a little make up, or buying a nice perfume. If you don't feel good about your looks, do something different. We are all beautiful in our own way. You can take the green-eyed monster, jealousy out by declaring things about yourself that are wonderful. Start today by noticing the beauty that lies within you. You are a bombshell, just be you.

"IT'S THE LITTLE THINGS THAT COUNT"

In the world we live in today, where status seems to mean everything, I think we have some how lost touch of how much "little" things mean. Everyone is so busy trying to keep up with their neigbors or what we see on tv, that we've forgotten how good it actually feels to be kind. Simple gestures as holding the door open for the person behind you or letting someone over in traffic. When was the last time that you did something for someone just because? There is so much going on in the world today, simply watching the news can cause your heart to be heavy. Take some time out to sit down as a family for dinner, walk your kids to the door and pray with them before they head out for school. Help your neighbor rake their leaves. You would be suprised at what a kind gesture could do for someone who is down. Remember it doesn't cost you anything to make a difference in someone's life. So let's get to work.

"RESCUE ME"

In April 2004, I was riding down the highway and my car was hit by another vehicle that was going 20 over the speed limit. The force of the crash spun my car around and forced me into the wall at full force, the airbag deployed and burned my face and my eyes. The impact left an imprint of the seatbelt in my chest. When I look back at how I was living my life, I knew who God was but, I didn't have a relationship with him. I knew what prayer was but, I never talked to God and rarely thanked him. Then on impact, when that car hit me and my truck began to spin I began to call on the Lord, it was as if everything was moving in slow motion, the car spun from the second lane of a four lane highway to the shoulder and into the wall without being hit by another car. By the Grace of God, my life was spared. I learned an important lesson that night, God is always there, he loves you and he wants to save you. As I  grew in my relationship with Him over the past 7 years I've even learned more from this accident, if I had been actively pursuing and nuturing my relationship with Christ, that entire accident could have been blocked. I am not the Captain of my own life, nor do I want to be, I trust God to be in TOTAL control of my life. You see God was always there even though I had taken detours in my life when I called on The Name of THe LOrd he was waiting for me. I now know that God is not my life jacket waiting to rescue me, but he is The Captain of my sea.

" DEADBEATS NEED LOVE TOO"

I was talking to a group of single parents, they were complaing about their children's other parent and although they were probaly telling truth, I watched as their children sat attentively holding on to their every word. In the bible the 1st commandment that comes with a promise from God is to "Honor thy Mother and Father". On a daily basis I see children who talk back, who are disobedient, and who have NO respect for their parents. My question is what part does parents play in this? As parents of course, we want the best for our children, so we have to be careful what we are allowing our children to see us doing or hear us saying. We should no longer say," do as I say,not what I do", we need to be REAL examples of how we expect our children to behave. Even when dealing with an absent parent or a non-supportive parent, we should be telling the children to Honor and respect that parent because that's what the Word of God commands our children to do. This is so that their days may be long on the earth. Don't get so caught up in the hurt that you are feeling that you participate in your child going against God's commandment. We have to stop having grown up conversations in front of and with our Children, regardless, to whether the co-parent is actually involved in upbring of the children. It is our duty to make sure that your children respect and reverence that parent. The Word of God doesn't say " Honor thy mother and father" if they take care of you. It says that period!!! Today I ask that we watch what we say in front of our children, that we remind our children of this commandment. Don't allow your disappointment in someone to cause you to keep your child from keeping this commandment. Love your child enough to encourage them to love the other  parent inspite of the circumstances.

"WHEN IT'S TIME TO OPT OUT"

I was at a local supermarket and saw a couple arguing as they got into their vehicle. The man was yelling and cursing and the woman's face was filled with terror as she looked around to see if anyone was paying attention. As she began to back up, he lifted his hand and smacked her across her face. My heart dropped.  I sat in my car as I watched them drive away and all sorts of questions raced through my mind. When did this relationship become abusive? Of course, at some point this relationship had to be good. Why was she still there? Would she leave him today? Will I see her someday in the news as a victim or will she snap and end up hurting him? Thousands of women and men are physically abused by a partner each day and if you are one of these women, you must put an end to it now. Love doesnot hurt. Don't be flattered by a possessive or jealous mate, that's a red flag. Volatile relationships aren't the norm and we should never be on the giving or receiving end of abuse whether mental or physical. It is up to us to decide what we will take in a relationship. You are worth being in a relationship with someone who protects you and builds you up. If you and your mate can't disagree without physically hurting one another, it is time to end it. There are programs and places for victims of domestic violence. You must choose to let go of all unhealty relationships. There is someone out there that will love you, cherish you, and adore you. Hitting is not a form of affection and if it happens once chances are more likely than not that it will happen again. If you or someone you know are being abused please contact me @ ladymelissaewest@yahoo.com. End the cycle today by getting help.

"NEVER LEAVE HOME WITHOUT IT"

What do you want out of your life? Do you long for a new house, a car, or perhaps, a better job? Have you set a plan on how you will obtain your greatest desire? Have you convinced yourself that you will never be able to get this or do you believe that you will be able to do what is needed to obtain this desire? Life is not chance driven, it is purpose driven. We have to know that we can get to our destination but, we have to be on the right road, we have to have a working GPS, with a full powered battery. We can do this by reading the bible and by spending time alone with God. He will guide you and take you exactly where he intends for you to go and even though there may be detours, he's right there guiding you. How silly would it be for you to get in the car and just drive without a destination? Would it make sense to be going somewhere you have never been but, not ask for direction? Before we were born God has a purpose for us, a destination for our lives. It is our choice to continue working on our dreams, to never give up. You may need some assitance along the way but, just remember that your GPS(GOD the PROBLEM SOLVER) is right there when you need him!! Stay focused, keep pushing..YOU CAN DO IT!!!

ATTENTION LADIES YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS OUT!!!

"HIS DAUGHTERS"

LIFESTYLE OVERHAUL

"KNOW YE NOT THAT YE ARE THE TEMPLE OF GOD, AND THAT THE SPIRIT OF GOD DWELLTH IN YOU" I CORINTHIANS 3:16

6 MONTH COURSE

3 DAY/WEEK FITNESS WORKOUT

WEEKLY HEALTHY EATING TIPS/ MENU SUGGESTIONS

HAIR AND SKIN TIPS

WEEKLY WEIGH-INS/ BODY MASS AND MEASUREMENTS

ACCOUNTABILITY PARTNERS

 

 

CLASSES BEGIN ON DECEMBER 2^nd, 2011 6:30 p.m.

"THE MASTER DOJO"

13987 RAISED ANTLER CIRCLE

DEER RUN SHOPPING CENTER

MIDLOTHIAN, VA 23112

804-739-6432/856-313-5356

FITNESS INSTRUCTOR (KARL M. WEST)

LIFESTYLE COACH (LADY MELISSA E. WEST)

COST: $30.00/ MONTH

 

 

"CHANGING LIVES FROM THE INSIDE OUT"

"WHERE GREAT WOMEN STRIVE TO MAKE BETTER CHOICES"

 

" THE MOST IMPORTANT RSVP"

3 years ago my life came to a complete stop while in full motion. On the eve of Mother's day, I lost my mother to cancer. What a devastating time it was for me, my 5 sisters, and my father( who had been married to my mom for almost 39 years). My mom was an awesome Woman of God, she served the Lord with gladness and everyone that spoke of her only had wonderful words to say. As we rode in the limousine to her funeral, I couldn't help but, wonder why? Have you ever questioned why God has allowed something to happen? During the months following the passing of my mom, I began to see and understand the fullness of God. Although, I was hurting and missing my mother I had such a great example of what a Woman of God is, while she was here. I was blessed to have her for all the years that she was on loan to us. What a great gift that God did bestow upon me even if for such a short time. I saw that I must really take charge, my mom had reserved her mansion in heaven and instead of me focusing on how bad I missed her, I began to focus on how bad I wanted to see her again. I realized that the only way I could do that was to have my own relationship with Christ. If you have ever lost someone important to you, at some point you have to decide what it will take to see that loved one again. We must truly believe that God doesn't make any mistakes. Yes, we will miss them, but, God's will is lined up with our desire, if we choose God's way,  we will see them again. Reserve your spot in heaven today, ask God to come into your life now, believe that Jesus died on the Cross to save you from your sins, admit that you are a sinner. If you did this today please leave me your email in the comment section or email me @ ladymelissaewest@yahoo.com so I can contact you and get some information to you.

" TOE TO TOE'

Lately everyone that I have come in contact with seems to be attacked by Satan in one way or the other. From sicknesses to children not behaving to financial woes the devil is busy and on his job. Speaking for myself personally, I am tired of sitting back and allowing these attacks to take place. It isn't that I'm not praying or reading my word but, am I speaking exactly what I know will make the devil, STEP BACK and STEP OFF? For so long I have allowed the devil's tactics, I've let him wage war on me and my family, and although I had defensive moves; there were many days of my life that were portraits of defeat and many situations where I could easily be listed as a casualty of war. TODAY, I stand on offense, TODAY, I will cross the battle line, no longer will I be a soldier, I choose to be the general. I am taking control and stepping in line by speaking the Word of God, what good is knowing it when you are constantly being defeated by the tricks of the enemy.  I will not retreat, I will not lose. The devil must know that I know the Power of the force behind me and today, I become his adversary. It is time that we stop allowing circumstances, situations, curses, and lies to defeat us. How GREAT do you think God is? Try him. Put your back to his back and come out punching, hold nothing back, fight as if your life depends on it.....because it actually does.

"FADED BEAUTY"

Have you ever really taken the time to look at a bouquet of flowers after they've sat in a vase for more than a week? The petals have fallen off, the stem has bent, they are ready to be thrown away. They aren't reminiscent of the beautiful, vibrant bouquet at all. In some cases, such as with sunflowers, you can take the seeds from the middle of the dead flower, plant them and with time and nurturing a beautiful sunflower will appear. This reminds me of our relationship with Christ. I'm sure you can remember the day you decided to make Christ your Lord and Savior, it may have been in front of your entire church or maybe it was a quiet moment alone while watching a broadcast on television. Either way, it was a special time and I can guarantee you couldn't get enough of God. People could see that something was different and like the bouquet of flowers many people were attracted to the beauty of your salvation. What often happens is that as time passes we forget that we could have taken seeds from that bouquet and we sit around waiting for a special occassion to get a new bouquet. Have you lost the joy of your salvation because you're waiting on someone like your pastor or spiritual mentor to  push you? Can people see that same fire and zeal that you once had for the Lord? Even when everyday circumstances come in like a flood, we must remember that the joy of the Lord is our strength. Our primary job as God's daughter's is to be a witness, not only with our mouths but, through the life that we live. Will people be able to look at you and see how awesome it is to be born again? Stop waiting for a refreshing from someone else and begin to cultivate it within yourself. Set aside time to study on your own, pray for yourself, praise the Lord in the comfort of your own home. Remember, just as the bouquet died after an amount of time of being seperated from bush it grew on, your relationship with Christ will seem without life, if you fail to continuously take seeds and plant and nuture them. Don't neglect your lifeline, the world needs to see the beauty in a Daughter of God.  The Bible says, "The grass withers, The flowers fadeth but, the Word of Our God Shall stand forever....Can people see the Word be lived through you?

36-24-36

With everything that we deal with in life as women, one of the most important areas of our lives is our appearance. We have children which takes a toll on our body. We spend so much time nuturing our families but, do we take time out for ourselves? Do you ever wish you had the figure that you had before your kids back? Do you think it's impossible or do you think you will never have the time to get in shape or stay in shape so you never take the 1st step? How important is being physically in shape to you? The bible says that our body is the temple of God. Have you ever thought that you may lack energy or patience because of how you are taking care of your body? We were all created in different shapes and sizes but, that shouldn't mean to get and stay out of shape but, to work on staying fit. We can't keep making excuses about why we are unfit or out of shape. The same way God expects us to be obedient in other areas of our lives, he expects us to take care of this precious gift: YOUR BODY!!! You wouldn't want God to have to dwell in a building without windows, that was barely standing so, why would you want the Holy Spirit to dwell in you while you're out of shape and run down. We are kingdom beings and we represent the Kingdom of God so our appearance is important. Take pride in yourselves. You don't have to be a size 2, it is important that we work on being what God intended for us to be. You are a brickhouse and you're body is the Temple of God. Let's set a goal today to work on our body and keep our appearance up.

"HELP A SISTER OUT"..."WOMAN TO WOMAN"

Every Friday is "HELP A SISTER  OUT DAY"...let's help this sister out:

I am 39 years old and I have been married for 6 years. My husband and I have a combined family, we were both previously married and have 5 children collectively. My husband is a deacon in our church and I serve on the usher's board, we both love the Lord. Our children get along well and its as if we have been together forever. This is my dilemma, my husband's ex-wife "in my opinion" doesn't know boundaries. She calls my husband even when it doesn't involve the children. At functions that requires us all to attend she hugs him and kisses him on the cheek. She is also remarried. She doesn't do this in front of her husband, she waits until he leaves the room. She calls my husband when she to share "her" life. She hardly ever speaks to me. My husband says, "they are just friends" and that she doesn't mean anything by it. I feel that I am totally being disrespected but, I don't want to seem like I'm making something out of nothing. What can I do to stop this without causing a big deal?? I don't care for this woman because I believe she is intentionally doing this. What would you do???

"BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER"

It's the holidays and time for food, family, and fun. Often times when family comes together the past is brought up and the fire in family feuds is rekindled. I often ask myself what I can do about the past. The answer to that is NOTHING. We can't change what has happened but, we can make an effort to have a great future for our family today. If someone in your family has hurt you, this is the year to start a new. If you have offended a family member, apologize. Our communties can only be as strong as our families and it's time to take a step towards this healing. We cannot be the reason the generational curses continue or why there will be discord between our future generations. A kind gesture, a phone call, a card, an apology can make a world of a difference. When all is said and done...FAMILY IS FOREVER!!!!

"WHO YOU GONNA CALL"

It  is often said that the downfall of a relationship is caused by a lack of communication. We wait until we are at our wits end and then we blow up sometimes with the other individual not even knowing how we felt at all. The strength of a relationship can ultimately depend on the level of communication that's involved. Sometimes we get so busy that we neglect one of the most important aspects of our relationship with Our Father. PRAYER. Would God recognize your voice if you called out to him today? Would you recognize his? How often do you talk to him? Do you call on him only when there's trouble? Spending time talking to God is a necessity for your christian walk, he loves to hear from you and not just when the going gets rough. It is vital that we nurture our relationship with God. He wants to hear from you, because he loves you. He longs to guide you, he desires to spend time with you. God wants you to tell him that you appreciate him, he enjoys intimate time with you. Set aside some time for you to spend some time alone with Him. Don't let God be your last choice when problems hit and you have no one else to call. Get in the habit of talking to him daily, in good and bad. When friends are busy and you can't get anyone on the phone, remember God is ALWAYS  waiting at the throne.

"THE FLIPSIDE TO THANKSGIVING"

This Thursday is Thanksgiving. Obviously, this is a time to look at all that God has done for you and give thanks but, it is most importantly a time to give. Everywhere we turn there are negative images and reasons to have no hope but, when you are enjoying the blessing of being a Child of God, there is joy. Let's come together this week and choose to be a blessing to others. It may not be something monetarily but, something as simple as complimenting someone or giving someone a ride. We become so consumed with our lives and what we are going through that it becomes so hard to see anyone else. This week I ask that we go out of our way to be a blessing to someone else, no matter how small you may think your act of kindness is, you may be the only hope or help that individual has. Together we can make a difference. I would love it if you would post how you have helped others in the comment section, throughout the week. Remember everyone...WE ARE BLESSED TO BE A BLESSING!!!

"NOT MY CHILD"

Has someone ever come to you and told you that your child was behaving inappropriately or have you ever caught your child doing something that they knew was wrong? It's not a good feeling. Then comes the punishment, depending on the offense determines the severity of the punishment. One punishment in particular that I remember during my teen years was not being able to go out with my friends when I had planned to. I had my outfit all ready and boy, was I excited but, because I had broken the rules my plans were cancelled. As, a mom I've come to realize that it's a great disappointment to see your child rebel or make mistakes. We want so bad to believe the best of our children and we're quick to say, "Not my child". Well, this is how God feels about us. It hurts him when we sin and go against the boundaries he has set for us. He feels what we feel, when we say, "My child wouldn't do something like that," and just like it is in your home there is punishment when we go against God's rules, plans are cancelled and blessings are missed. My parents would often say, "this is going to hurt me, more than it hurts you" and in my mind I would think they had to be joking. Look at it this way, God has great plans for each of us and when we begin to walk in disobedirnce it must truly hurt Him to see us miss out on the greatness that he has planned in our life. Do you want to live a life full of God's promises and blessings? Of course, you do? Have you ever looked at what's in your life that could be causing God to say, "Not my Child"? What areas in your life can you begin to work on today that would make your Heavenly Father say, "NOW THAT'S MY CHILD"?

"HE SAY, SHE SAY"

On any given day, at any given time we can turn on the tv and see men taking paternity tests, being labled "deadbeats", cheaters, or worse. Between reality shows, talk shows, our judical systems and even in our daily conversation men are getting a bad "rap". What about us? What about the women who are choosing these men, who are an equal part of these relationships, and love the drama that comes along with being the woman of a man labled "a bad boy"? There are standards for school, to get something as simple as a license, standards are set for jobs but, where relationships are concerned are standards being set? Women say they want a man that works, is romatic, faithful, who provides, who protects, who is a good dad, who loves the Lord, etc.. Yet, are  you carrying your weight? Women have we gotten so independent that we don't cook anymore, we don't keep the house clean, we don't send our men to work with a homemade lunch but, we're upset when he goes out to lunch with a co-worker? Is what you say you want in a man the total opposite of what you have at home? Do you want him to be saved and have a relationship with Christ but, you're hopping in bed with him every chance you get? If he isn't what you want, why get in a relationship to try to make him be what you want him to be, but then you're upset when he can't measure up, but you already knew who he was in the beginning? Women it's time we really take a step back and see what part we play in dysfunctional relationships. Every household has duties. Our children are watching and our families are suffering. There is nothing wrong with being a single woman. There's nothing wrong with a woman being the primary cook. If we want somethings to change why not start with ourselves. Stop complaining and start making it work. Start praying for your mate even if you don't have one yet. Let's take a moment today and write a list of what we can do better, to either create a better situation that we are already in or to prepare for who will come into our lives. Let's honor a good man when we have one. The healing of the family can start with us. Being a woman is an awesome thing and when you exercise your greatness, we can make a difference.

"HELP A SISTER OUT"

Today is a day set aside for questions from my followers: 

I have been with a man for 2 years, we live together, our finances are comingled and we are about to have our 1st child. My boyfriend tells me he loves me but, we have 2 different lifestyles. I attend church, while my boyfriend stays at home, I have never tried to force it on him, he likes to go to the bar and hang out with his friends. When the conversation of marriage comes up, he tells me that one day we will get married. What should I do? 

"NOT MY WILL"

For so many years I did what I wanted and for so many years I was on the wrong track. I lived the life I wanted to, I said what I wanted, I picked the career I wanted and I never thought about the fact that there was already a plan for my life made and written out long before I even was formed in my mother's womb. What is so amazing about life is the fact that we have choices and that we can live our lives by our own free will. After years of mistakes, missed opportunities, and disappointment, I woke up one day and said there has to be more. All of those years, I hadn't intended to make mistakes, but, finally I began to see that free will doesn't mean doing your will but, it means choosing whose will you will follow. Will you be a free agent or will you join a team? At that point, I chose a team...TEAM JESUS!!! With this team, came a contract( the gift of salavation),there is longevity in this team (eternity), I have a great defense (The Holy Spirit), My play book cannot be beat (The Word of God); which I study everyday and all I have to do is catch the ball and run with it. My coach is the King of Kings. I now can accept the physical responsibility but, I know I'm covered because, he knows all the players in my life. I go by his rules, I lay down my will for his will and his intended  purpose for mylife. Let us put down our will for His. Lord, today we ask that you remind us that when we are in your will, we are playing by the rules and we can't go wrong.

"THE F WORD"

Are you a worrier? Do you over think things to the point that you can talk yourself out of the blessing or the will of God? Do you believe that God will do all that he said he will do? We must get to the point in our lives where we learn to totally depend on God. What are you afraid of? When we find ourselves in a financial crisis or have gotten a negative health report we have to decide to have faith in God's ability and not go into Fear mode. Fear is nothing more than lies being whispered cunningly in your ear by the enemy of your soul, Satan. The Word of God says.."Without Faith it is IMPOSSIBLE to please God" (Hebrews 11:6) so we cannot possibly expect things to be peaceful and joyous when we are constantly walking in fear. The best part of life is having a choice, know that in every situation you have the choice whether you will believe for the best or wait for the worse. Whatever you think you can accomplish you can. We don't have to live our lives fearful that things will go wrong. In FAITH there is power. Let us become FAITH individuals..put a smile on not only our faces but, on God's, by letting go of our FEARS.

"GETTING RID OF WHAT'S POISON"

Have you ever heard the term "Crabs in a barrel"? Have you taken a moment to evaluate the relationships in your  life? A lot of times we put so much into relationships and never seem to get anything back. Once you begin letting go some of the things that are unhealthy about yourself, you have to begin to look at relationships, because through them, the yucky things that you worked so hard to let go can sneak back into your life.  It's not that we should judge people but, we need to judge ourselves. If we find that we are always surrounded with people who are negative, how can we have a positive outlook? People who aren't willing to change, don't want to see you grow either. Have you noticed that after you have a conversation with a person who complains about everything you feel drained? The same way that it is important to wash your hands after being around a contagious person in the physical, at times it becomes necessary to wash your hands of a person who is sick with a complaining, negative spirit. The bible says, "we are to guard our heart", what things are you allowing in your atmosphere that is causing you heartache or leaving you with a heavy heart? We cannot allow relationships to hinder us, they should enhance our lives. I urge you to take inventory of who you are giving your heartto and if it hurts more than it helps, it may be time to let it go.

"A NEW STORY"

When we decide that we can no longer live our lives the way we want to and give our lives over to Christ, we are on our way to becoming not only the women we want to be but, the women that God intended for us to be. This is so important where LETTING GO is concerned. When we were created, God knew that he created all things good and that includes YOU!!! You are a child of God, when you give your life to him, then you can boldly say, I am "HIS DAUGHTER". Now, not only can you walk with your head held high, but, you have a right to all of GOD's promises. We don't have to keep reminding ourselves of who we used to be because God sees us for who we are now. There comes a time in life when we must stop looking back, when we begin to turn our fears of the future and hurts from the past into trust. Today I urge to remember that there is nothing you can do about what has happened yesterday, but, today has unlimited possibilities and promises. Today can be the start of a beautiful past, so live today in its fullness, and when tomorrow comes there will be no regrets. Let go of yesterday, Live today in all its glory, for when tomorrow comes you'll begin to love your story!!

Today I pray that each moment for you is filled with peace and joy.

" THIS IS YOUR APPOINTMENT NOW"

Ladies, it is NEVER too late to start over. Yesterday, I asked you what kind of woman are you? We determined that you are a MASTERPIECE, you cannot be duplicated. You are rare and precious, you ALREADY possess everything that you need to be the best YOU!!! This week we are going to talk about LETTING Go. Have you ever felt like you were riding in the vehicle of life but, you aren't getting anywhere? What about those of you who are successful by trade, yet, you still have a sense of unfulfillment. Have you asked yourself, "What's next"?? There is something inside of us all that wishes we could have done this or thinks what if we made a different choice about a certain situation in our lives. Today, I urge you to let it go. You are who you are and you are where you are at this particular time and place to be someone that can never be replaced...THE BEST YOU!!! You have experience from your mistakes, you've gained wisdom through your tears, your heartache has made room for love, your error is now your story, YOU were born with the strength to LET GO. Although, we cannot erase our past, we can surely write our future. Let's make an appointment with success, let love write your name in her books, because we won't give our past anymore space in our minds. Today we embrace who we are and LET THE PAST GO!!

WHAT KIND OF WOMAN ARE YOU???

It would be easy for women to say that they are the way they are because of past relationships or perhaps because of their childhood, but when we look at the state of women today I pose this question, What can we do to be better? In life there are many challenges, most because of choices. I believe that it is time for us to step up and forgive ourselves. When we forgive ourselves, it becomes easier for us to forgive others. Maybe a past relationship ended on a sour note or maybe we didn't have an ideal childhood. Should we allow our past to determine our future or affect our present?? I say, "NO". I'm sure a goal for us all is to be happy and happiness begins within. So let us look within ourselves and be proud of our growth. If you've made it out of that bad relationship or managed to raise your children as a single mom, then celebrate yourself. God made us in his image and likeness, we deserve to be treated as royalty. It all begins with us. I challenge you to look in the mirror and begin to embrace your beauty. There is no one in the world that could be you. Your trials can create your triumph. YOU ARE A MASTERPIECE.